Why do we like to look at the car crash?

Jesus said in Matthew 24 that wherever there were dead bodies, the vultures would gather.  That's pretty much true, isn't it?

I remember my years growing up in southern Missouri and northern Arkansas and seeing circles of vultures over an area and, when I asked why, was alway told, "There's probably something dead or dying over where they're flying.  They're just waiting their turn to eat."

It's the same phenomena I see around today when there is a car crash on the highway or if an ambulance goes through the neighborhood - we tend to follow it with our eyes to see what we can see.

I'm pretty sure that if people genuinely weren't interested in looking at wrecks, we'd have MUCH fewer traffic snarls and jams around them - but people want to slow down "to be safe", or so they say - I think they slow down to see the carnage.  We just seem drawn to it.

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I've noticed that same thing with my own deconstruction and rebuilding process.  If and when I make a post that has some kind of more direct reference to the job I just left or to any potential disagreement that I might have had with someone there, there is great interest.  

I can tell because the blog application gives you a readout of unique visitors to each post. If there's a hint of something about "church" work that I did, the views skyrocket and, if not, the word doesn't spread, the blog isn't read.

And I guess I get it.  People want to know about what's going on with the people they know, what happened in the past, what might happen in the future, etc.  We especially want to know if there's some kind of juicy or salacious thought or story involved.  

We like to look at the car crash.

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Some years back I got a call from my wife.  I was headed to the office and she and our youngest were headed out of Little Rock and to Kansas City for a weekend visit with family.  

Her first words were something to the effect of "We're okay. But we have been in a wreck and we're gonna need you to come and get us."

As I turned around, my mind is racing, wondering what happened, who might be hurt, what the scene might look like, etc.

As I changed highways and got on to the interstate they were on, I was quickly in gridlock, barely moving traffic.  And in my mind, I was thinking, "Great, I need to get to my family and we have a traffic back up!  What else can happen?!"

It took me a couple of minutes to realize that the traffic was seriously backed up BECAUSE of the wreck my wife was in.

When I got to them, they were up against the inside/fast lane median.  Another driver swerved into them and smashed the passenger side and then smashed them into the fence/wall.  Both sides of the vehicle were trashed, both front tires flattened - it was not drivable and was eventually totaled.

My wife and son were fine.  Stunned and a little shaken up, but okay.  The trip they were on was not an issue.  The moment demanded all our attention - all of it.

Everything moved in slow motion - and not just the traffic.

The state troopers that were there directing traffic, talking to the other driver, etc - all of it was like watching a movie.  

I'd pulled up and parked in front of my wife's disabled vehicle and we began loading everything out of the wrecked vehicle into my car.  Luggage, pillows, stuffed animals, toys, food, etc.  

We were on the side of a large highway, in the middle of very slow moving traffic, moving all our personal stuff from one vehicle to another - from a car we'd never drive again to the only car we had left.  All eyes on us, driving really slowly by us.

Even though there was no injury and no ambulance, I got to feel what it's like to be the one on the side of the road.  Vulnerable.  A spectacle.  Something that people observing are developing theories about and wondering aloud about.  

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It makes me pause and reflect on other "car crashes" that people crane their necks to look at.  

It makes me a lot more empathetic to people who are going through something that I THINK I know something about, but actually am just guessing about.

It reminds me that, too often, other people's situations are just opportunities for entertainment or selfish interest and not much else.

It causes me to consider what it's like to have someone watch you like a buzzard circling over a mashed possum on the side of the road.

It reminds me to keep my head in the middle of crazy circumstances that I don't know anything about.

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Divorces.  

Illnesses.  

Conflicts.  

Anything on "the news".  

People who seem crazy.  

People who make choices differently than I make.  

People who frustrate the stew out of me.

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Have a lot of grace.  Don't stare.  Keep moving.  Know there's more going on than you can know.