Aren't you afraid...?

A common thing I hear from some people is "Aren't you afraid that...?" followed by a host of different possible fears that the questioner has.

Aren't you afraid some people will hear what you're saying and take it the wrong way? 

Aren't you afraid some people will quit going to church and will not want to worship God?

Aren't you afraid some people will not want to have anything to do with you anymore?

Aren't you afraid some people will think it's not important to give to church or to serve others?

Aren't you afraid some people will not be able to "keep up" with God if they don't go to church?

Aren't you afraid some people will abuse grace if they think God doesn't hold sin against them now?

Aren't you afraid some people will __________?

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You get the idea. 

The most common denominator of all those conversations has been "fear" and "people".  

In other words, why aren't you afraid like we are?  Why don't you fear people's reaction like we do?

Those are really good questions and I 100% get where they come from.  

They come from fear which comes from experiences or rumors or stories or even teaching.

All those questions and their variants assume the questioner is right and I am wrong.

No. I disagree.  

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Going back to an earlier post - the one about apologies to divorced people - I mentioned that anyone going through deconstruction and/or rebuilding are often assumed to have lost their way and thus lost their mind - you know, "I know you'll come back around later when your head is clearer".

I really do get where that is coming from. 

I feel the love from some people who want the "old me" back and nothing but smiles and "yes man" responses to anything having to do with or about church stuff. The old me version was quick to agree, generally speaking, and set you at ease, etc.

I feel the condescension from some people who assume that I need to get in line and quit rocking people's boats - that I'm wrong and that "right" is doing whatever needs to be done to make religion and "church" as we know it look good because *that's* what's gonna stop the hemorrhaging and will bring people back.

I feel the anxiety from some people that some of those close to them are upset, angry, or mad that I am/someone is messing with the system and that I could be the target of their scorn and they're unhappy that some of the people in their lives have such different points of view - can't we all just get along?

I feel the confusion from some who do not see what I've been talking about because, in their mind, the way things have been is how God set things up - how can I possibly have a problem with church and God and their favorite leaders, etc?  It's all the same to them - if you don't see it all as good, you're the problem.

I feel the fear from some who are trying to keep their foot on the dock and one foot in the boat that is leaving for a different shore - desperately wanting to hold on to the security of the known and yet longing for a journey that seems to offer hope, but at the cost of that security.

____________

So, no.  I'm not afraid.  

I know that regardless of what I say or do, those that you "fear for" are going to have those same struggles or doubts.

I know that God's got all this.

I know perfect love casts out fear and if you're still afraid, you've not been made perfect in love.  That's in 1 John if you want to go look it up.

I feel sorry for you and I wish that you weren't afraid, but that's something you and God have to work out.

_____________

Probably, if anything, I want to ask...

Aren't you afraid that your kids, grandkids, etc are just playing along with you about God and church because they don't want to upset you but, as soon as you're gone and/or out of sight, they're gonna do what they want.  Don't you want them to have an honest conversation about faith, life, God, etc, even if it means you find out they've got a different version than you?

Aren't you afraid that one of these days, "church" and all it's goodness, will fail or disappoint you and/or someone you love and, because you/they haven't "done the work", as it were, they'll just walk away because they've never seen anyone work through some of those hard questions and have only witnessed people being "yes men" to whatever a church leader, etc has to say?

Aren't you afraid that you're possibly burying your head in the sand because you like going to church and enjoying the social benefits, the places to serve, the feeling you're connected to something larger, the cool things your family enjoys from it - even though there are people in your life who don't have anything to do with church that are are open to God and the good news, just not your religious social club?

Aren't you afraid you have few if any non-church people in your circle of influence/life because you've isolated yourself with like-minded, like-appearing, like-thinking people who want to circle the wagons and keep the traditions going that help them feel safe, even if they're disconnected from actually sharing the good news of Jesus with others - you know, the whole point of where those traditions started?

And so on.  

I have a long list of things I wonder if people have thought about.

And let me say this counterintuitive thing - if you are afraid of any of those things - don't be.

I'm not afraid of any of those things I hear from people occasionally.

You don't need to be afraid either.  

God will use where you are and what you're doing or going through to lead you, if you're interested, into whatever he has next for you.  

Don't live in fear.  

Step confidently into whatever you're doing and be open to the benefits/consequences of whatever that is.

If you want/need to follow someone kind of religious law, spoken or unspoken, written or implied, do it with all your might and energy.

If you want/need to lean into grace and mercy, trust and dependence on God, by all means do that!

Don't live in fear. 

That's not what God has in mind. 

Jesus said, "Fear not" or "don't be afraid" an amazing amount of times.

If that doesn't make sense or doesn't line up with what you've heard, learned, or experienced - don't let it make you afraid - just go learn about it, figure it out, and trust that God has got you through it all.

A whole lot of grace and peace and not being afraid to you and yours.