That you may know your God...

Knowing God and interacting with God in a different way has been an amazing and surprising part of the journey over the past few years.

I've known about God because I "grew up going to church" and I'm sure God was showing himself to me in ways through that and people and more, but it's different now.

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Fear is gone. For the most part. In one of the John letters, the writer says that perfect love casts out fear. I think I used to say that I wasn't afraid of God, but I see there's a difference between mentally knowing I don't have to fear God and being in a different kind of relationship where I don't fear God.

In Job 13:15, he says, "even if God kills me, I will trust in him". Wow, that's big. I heard that in a song years ago and struggled with the idea and I think I get it now.  At least more than before.

Fear of the Lord IS the beginning of wisdom. It is the start of understanding things, but it’s not the place we stay with God.

God wants to show me things and wants me to show him what I see. In Ephesians, Paul says "find out what pleases the Lord". He's not saying to build a list of do's/don'ts that'll make God happy if you follow them, he's more saying, "find out what pleases the Lord" - it's an invitation for him to show stuff to us.

He does that all the time. Recently he unpacked a little more understanding of what it's like to be someone who is around people who want something from you all the time by showing me how I am with him and how people are with each other.

And through that, I get a glimpse of a loneliness that must exist at times - that's weak language - maybe a bareness of relationship is better - that he wants us to know him and not just for us to hang out with him because of the stuff he has or might have for us - kind of like a lottery winner who suddenly has friends.

I remember some years ago talking with a guy who was in a band and they had a bass player they didn't like much, but he had a good PA system and equipment they could all borrow - sometimes I get the sense that people are that way with God.

God isn't against us doing things "for him" but prefers us to make our relationship with him the priority. Jesus said that a day will come when people will say, "Lord, we did all these great things in your name" and they WILL have done a lot of great things, but he will say, "I never knew you".

We can make "church" or being good or not being too bad or adopting a lot of religious behaviors an important part of our life, schedule, and bank account and it can STILL have little to nothing to do with having a relationship with God.

100% NOT saying God can't or doesn't work through those things to share his good news or to build people up, but I've witnessed plenty of people, including myself, substitute just about anything they can find to do or invest themselves into rather than knowing God.

I get it - that's our culture and that's what most people have been taught - it's what I was taught. But for so many of those people, there's a constant cycle of investing, trying really hard, failing or getting tired, and wondering what's wrong with them.  Jesus said come to him for rest, not a "to do list".

Community, like emotions, can mislead us. Similar to the previous idea, we can be brought up or into God thinking it is all about a gathering or a community and leave it at that. We can believe that because we go to a building or someone's house and have a gathering, that we've done the most important thing.

Again, I get it - community or family in God IS important, but it's not the end all, be all. We have sometimes made the need to feel close to a lot of other church people into the high-water mark of being a Christian.  Closeness isn't bad, but it can be a distraction from God and an addiction that replaces him.

We SHOULD keep on getting together with other believers and sharing what we've learned and encouraging and building each other up in the Lord - but it needs to be "in the Lord" or centered on who he is and what he's made us and not simply a nice replacement for the people at the bar, high school, etc.

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In the times ahead, I hope to unpack that more with myself and others. I know there are people who know me and are concerned that I've left the faith or abandoned my sanity by not "going back to church". 

I know that for some, it's gonna be a difference of opinion that will always be there and for others, a hard thing to grasp that will remain mysterious.

But I also see, hear, and connect with a lot of people who are wondering, "Is it really possible?  Am I really loved by God?  Does he really want me to know him?  Is he okay with me not liking the K-Love pledge drive or most of the music on there?" and so on.

For those people and possibly for others I don't know about, I hope to share some things that clarify all that without coming across as being a hater who doesn't like "church" or church people.

I really do love people and see the amazing grace God has on ALL of us, even if we don't know and don't like it. 

May you come to know him and his love and grace if you haven't yet.

Now this is eternal life: that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent. John 17:3

Peace and goodwill to you and yours.