Mario-Cart Faith & Deconstruction

Why do people do that?  Why do they deconstruct?

Usually it is because something has interrupted them and the interruption was so big, so disturbing, they can’t just go back to what they were doing before.

What can interrupt someone like that? 

Usually it is something that seriously changes the way they see themselves and their reality.

For people who deconstruct around their faith, beliefs, or religion, it’s learning or becoming aware that something that was really big to how they saw their life is different than they thought before.

Not just a little different, but significantly different.  

It is relative to each person as to what “the thing” is.  

What might cause one person to begin to deconstruct might not cause someone else to do so.  What might cause you to deconstruct might be very different from what might cause someone else to deconstruct.

For one person, it might be learning some new truth about the Bible or history that heavily shifts what they leaned on before “spiritually” to something else.

For someone else, it might be an experience with people “from church” that surprises them and they realize that “church people” are very different from what they’d believed.

For some, it’s knowledge and for others, it’s an experience or set of experiences.  For most, it’s a blend of both knowledge and experiences that start, fuel, or accelerate the process of deconstruction.

One person might start and then stop; maybe even many times over their life. Sometimes deconstruction is “too much” and people choose to “go back” and live as if nothing has happened. 

Ignorance is bliss, or more appropriately ignoring the questions that came from the interruptions is bliss.

Another person might start deconstructing and then have someone intervene. The person who intervenes might redirect them “back” or toward a way of integrating what “shook them up” so they don’t go any further in the deconstruction process.

The “intervener” might teach them a way to always look for a way to justify why anything that causes doubts or questions is “okay” - that even if it doesn’t make sense now, it probably will in the future.  

Or they might teach them that some things are just supposed to be mysterious. And for some people, that works like a charm and they do that – find justification for doubts – for the rest of their lives.

For those who do go past the tipping point and begin to deconstruct with no view to stopping or turning back, the path can go in a lot of different directions.

It is not linear.  The outcome is not predetermined.  

The doors behind you seem to begin to close.

What do you mean by that? 

What does that mean - "to have your reality changed?"

Here’s a non-serious example of what it means or kinda, sorta feels like to have your reality changed. 

If you ever played video games before, you know there are times when you can play with multiple people on the same screen at once – each of you has your own part of the screen and you can see the others playing around you.

It’s not unusual, with some multi-player games, to find out that the game you thought you were playing was being played by someone else entirely and that your “player” onscreen was doing terribly the whole time. You were just watching someone else and “felt” like the screen you were watching was being controlled by you.

It’s an awkward feeling. 

You might have thought you were doing great and suddenly you realize you weren’t even playing the same game – your eyes were somewhere else entirely and the game you were actually playing wasn’t so great.

It’s awkward because you invest some energy into the game you’re playing and feel like you’re working hard against or with the other players – maybe you even have excited conversations about what you’re doing during it – and then you realize you’ve been working at nothing.  

You were only fooling yourself.

Or in some cases, you might feel like you were fooled by others who should have spoken up and said what was going on.

Deconstruction has that awkward feel to it, only at a pretty deep level.

When faith or belief is shaken up with some kind of interruption, there can be a wide range of feelings, initially - from joy to horror - just about anything is possible.

_______________

A more serious example I encountered myself, and conversed with others about over the years, is the realization that God might accept some kinds of people or some kinds of "worship services" I grew up being taught that God 100% did not accept.

I remember in the early '90's facing this idea that God probably did not actually think that a piano or other instrument in a worship service was as terrible a thing as I'd heard growing up.

I struggled hard inside for over a year - does God really accept people who worship with musical instruments? What if I'm wrong and he doesn't? If he doesn't, I've just stepped off the path of salvation and could be going to hell and taking others with me!

For most people who read that, you might think I'm joking or trying to punk you with some weird example - but no, that's something I walked through and it was gut wrenching. And I was one of many I know who struggled through that.

For some, that "struggle" just created a wider fellowship and they could secretly feel good about the Baptists and other people our tribe condemned.

For others, once you got to the other side of that particular issue, a larger series of earthquakes hit. 

If "we" are possibly wrong about that issue and God actually isn't sending Michael W. Smith and Amy Grant to hell for their music, what else might we be wrong about?

"Is our way of reading the Bible flawed?"

"Are we the only ones who feel weird about this?"

"Why does everyone seem to want to avoid talking about this?"

_______________

In other words, it can be complicated.  

Some can "shake it off" and move on, either out of necessity or distraction.

Some just see a larger picture that can't be unseen.

And they can't shove it all back in their eyes and pretend it doesn't exist.

More on that soon.

Peace and goodwill.